geez

I have been thinking, no over analyzing, lots of things lately. I can't seem to let my brain have any down time. Even when I watch TV I am really not paying attention to it. I have been waking up through out the night lately; which is causing me to over think things even more, because I can't think rationally, it's quite the vicious little cycle. (hey there poor grammar!) One of said things I have been dwelling on is the fact that I hate disappointing people. I pretty much try to do and tell people what they want to hear or at least what I think they want to hear. I really can't stop. That's why I avoid sales people at all cost. When I can't read people, problems arise. That's what is happening when people want me to make decisions and can't. Another reason why bigger groups make me nervous, especially when the focus is on me. I think this may stem from my mother having a short temper and high anxiety, who knows though. Whatever the cause, it's starting to be (been) a problem. I keep taking on more and more responsibility at work and at with the internship. Oh well, that's how I function I guess. If that's my worst flaw ( I know it's not) I should count myself lucky. Well, sorry for the big ramble and fantastic grammar, but I feel and little better and hope you do too!